Why do I never quite found a good man

She was not young nor beautiful, the ups and downs of life and burden to her looks haggard and old than the actual age. She told me that she has "good life", because she never met a better man. She said she was a perfectionist, the reality has had her very frustrated.
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I certainly understand that the pursuit of perfection is not wrong. May be entitled in this world have the perfect person? Then why are we ourselves perfect. Love is a perfect process, but the real live and marriage, but often with each other constantly inclusive, compromising the process.



Knowing that the loss of freedom, knowing that this is a lifetime appointment, to make each other happy, but also willing to make commitments. Love is not free to pursue the process, when you start complaining, you already do not love him.



When you are sorrowful, it is best to learn what things. Learning will make you and remain invincible.

Action to cure fear of medicine, but hesitate, delay will continue to nourish the fear.



This is intolerable

I am from Guangzhou, was born in 1966. Familiar with my ex-husband in 1987, when a group of friends go out, we cooked. Then he started chasing me, I was young, and still do not understand how love and marriage in the end is going on, sleepwalk and his love married and gave birth to sons. Originally, I was quite happy, he told me pretty good. Later, he changed a job, earn some money to gradually changed. At first found his gambling, but the larger the more gambling, of course, Quanguo many times, but does not always effective. While my heart is very excited about the money her husband to take it home and gambling, but still forgave him again and again.



About his son aged around, I found some of his unusual. At that time he often travel back late each time, but also often do not go home to live, was no cell phone, he uses a CALL machine, every time someone calls him he is very nervous, furtive phone calls, seems not to want me Wensheng like. I began to feel a doubt, but there is little evidence, on the surface he is doing a good enough effort, such as on time each month to the home or something. Then I can not help decide a showdown with him. I say you are not with somebody, if any, to clearly and simply told me, I will not quarrel with you, and you will not be trouble, we always want of a way to resolve this matter. First he did not admit it very cool to see me later, he finally admitted that was renting an apartment mistresses. He said the 21-year-old girl in Guangxi, they are familiar in the foot care center, have been together for months. I was very shock and can not accept. In particular, I heard he even took his son to go and the woman to eat, and listen to his son, then told me nothing, I am even more chilling. As promised he does not quarrel is not trouble, I really do not quarrel did not trouble to himself at home, eat, sleep, a full thought of a week, I think it can not tolerate his betrayal, so the prosecution to court for divorce. He was determined not agree, he said that women had no feelings and the outside is the fun, let me give opportunity to him. But I really can not live with him, that time is very hard, just quick divorce. The first sentence from the prosecution the court did not, this is what I asked my son go, one half of the house, then in order to expedite the divorce, I had agreed to his request, his son and the house owned by him, and I did not, he agreed. I only pick up his clothes out the door, but because of too painful, just one day earlier release, I promise what conditions.



Divorced, kept mistresses but also can not go back. Away from home is a very traditional family, married the daughter of a divorce that is not face-saving. I had a son who rented a house next to the school to live, as is the son of the school at noon to go to meet his son. Very difficult period of time passes, the most important is very much like his son, but only bite endured. Emotionally, I've always been a perfectionist, can not tolerate a man cheating on me.



Wasted years feeling helpless

I divorced in 1998, many people tell me about her boyfriend, I am also very hard to find a suitable person. It is these years, I have always had love, and also had two people living together is not a short time. But I do not know why, my life is always bad, is not a gambling man is familiar with alcoholism, anyway, there are always problems like this, people can not tolerate. So of course I also keep a man around, but no one I met, end up becoming nothing.



I also know it is the age and condition, I asked the man, just hope he is good to me, a responsible family man. Since I do not have the room, I hope he has room on it. In addition to not betray me, I also hope he will not gamble not to drink, better habits, not too bad hygiene. I never asked each other too much money, so long as to maintain a normal life on it. But is such a simple request, why can not touch.



I am familiar with him last year, after a friend introduced. When first met, I found his face was red, a bit like the way just drink wine, I'll ask you not love drinking, he said, not often drink, but occasionally only when friends get together to drink a little At that time I believed him. He is my first impression is good, because he looks a bit like my father. Three siblings, the father is the most loving me, so I especially love my father. We can not think of living together, I discovered that he not only gambling, but also fond of drinking. He is not only drink a little gathering of friends occasionally, but every meal drink, not only alcohol, and often drunk, a drunken bacchanal to Caesar. To this end, we had a falling out countless times, countless times I have thought about leaving him, but do not know why, every time left, my heart is still a lot of dismay. Then over time, he called me back, I could not help but come back to him. But he is also drinking habits have changed and drunk scolded me every time. I do not understand why they can not be determined to leave him, he knew he was dissatisfied with me, said: "You go I will not stop you, but you do not try to change me." Methods I have used many times to make him drink less point, and even look for him and his ex-wife's daughter, hope she persuade dad drink less wine. His daughter said to me, very reluctantly: "useless, he can not quit, if he can stop drinking, my mother would not divorce him." I began to realize that he left his wife the main reason is because of his alcoholism.



He not only alcohol, or a special no responsible person. He went to buy alcohol for a rich, ask a friend to dinner, after the money was used to ask me for money. My salary is not high, its still live frugally, but he never took care of me. Sometimes I think, Why am I always such an irresponsible man, why is my life so hard. We broke up countless times, countless times I move out of his house, can finally make the fire can not really pay off.



Weather-beaten look of the Road

I have been really satisfied with the current state of life, but also keep relatives and friends through a blind date. But do not know why, always never quite satisfied both sides. Some time ago someone introduced a seventy-year-old man to me, his good economic environment, they would have room, I had to forget, have a stable home I have to agree. But his sons and daughters said, cohabitation can, to get married is not enough. The elderly if they are afraid to go, I will account for what their home property. But for me they did not think about it, if just living together, what protection do I have. People with disabilities was also introduced to me, the economy does have a guarantee, but I went to see, and it is not satisfied.



Really, see the more men the more lack of confidence. That a big crowd, why people have to find a suitable so hard. My family is very satisfied with my current boyfriend, and my father worked with him said, hoping he can stop drinking, but he did not listen. Sister advised me to leave him, his sister, a set of empty houses, said that if I left he let me live, but after all not a permanent solution. He is a driving, is such a love drinking, in case something may be how the day had. So of course he mentioned to me several times about getting married, but I have not been agreed. I would like to drag so, see if you can find a better say.



Sometimes feel very happy, so are a little abnormal psychology. Logically such a nuisance, not only do not like it, simply do not want to see even see, tired of heart to see him drinking, and disgust, but also how to live with it. But that broke up so many times, but also how inseparable, I do not know how he is, and I was very hate myself, but no way.



From small to large, I am very loving father, father, of course, just an ordinary worker, but he is perfect in my mind. Grow up, I have been looking for a husband like his father, so I've always liked bigger man than me. Perhaps that is because I am a bit like a father, boyfriend, so I made a commitment to so many times can not leave him. Many times, thought, and broke up with him, as much as some like to leave my father, very lost. But together, and very painful. I am very contradictory, because too hard, and even affect their health and work, every day, thousands of times the subject were ups and downs in my mind: is taking? Is the house? But how to figure out, who can tell me how can I do?



Tell the whole process, she seemed a bit confused, and even some of the important things (such as marriage, divorce) time must think and think. Could see themselves in the end she does not seem to know what you want, but also figure out how to get their wish. More often, she is complaining about each other, express their dissatisfaction, but asked why she did not leave, she will become very confused.



More often, she told me that the conditions: there is no room, there is no bad habits, can not be registered ... ... However, I looked at her and asked: "love?" She seems in a daze for a time, long time no feet and look.



Yes ah, love, that we should have dominated the most important element of marriage, why has no one mentioned long, long time.